YOU:
(Subject) You made a wrong choice...
Jessica,YOu [sic] made a mistake by not keeping our appointment today. You really don't know what would have come of it. When I hear anyone say they WANT more than anything to be an actor I take that very seriously and you have no idea what kind of help I could have been to you. I have numerous connections in New York and I've gotten several actors in this department signed with the local TV and FILM agent -- and they've been working! I went to Yale School of Drama and received my MFA there in Acting -- I am friends with the Artistic Director of the Yale Rep Theatre and others in the business - I am plugged into numerous opportunities and programs that I've helped actors get into. I know the ropes and I could have been of enormous help to you if you were truly serious and believed you have talent - which I could have familiarized myself with. You should have kept your appointment with me. In this business it's all about networking and relationships and I was already thinking of ways I could help you with your audition package and support you in that -- even if it meant auditing the class (for a nominal fee) and helping you on a couple of pieces outside of class. You still would have learned an ENORMOUS amount by auditing!!! You should have come in and brainstormed this with me. And you shouldn't have canceled so closely to the time -- there would have been no harm in meeting me -- I planned on coming in FOR YOU! Jessica! Be well, Sarah
ME:
Well, Sarah!, congrats on the whole Yale thing and all your numerous connections and whatnot. I guess that's why you've got such a prestigious career teaching at the University of Memphis. Was that your first choice? I always know when someone is really important when they feel they have to list their credentials to prove something to me, a mere nobody as we've already established. Nothing like insulting someone who you were apparently so keen to make your protege by implying they have no talent. Oh, but not keen enough to let me in the class I actually wanted to take. You were going to do all of these favors for me and give me all of this personal time and attention outside of class, but you wouldn't give me a simple permit to take your class. But I would have learned such an ENORMOUS amount by taking, yet again, a beginner's acting class. Thanks, but no thanks. I promise you, I am a great deal more serious about and skilled in acting than the twenty year-olds in that class, or in your other class, which is supposedly too advanced for me, for that matter . I'm sure you think that you possess a wealth of knowledge, which I would be so lucky to take advantage of, but really, I'm a bit beyond that. I know you were shocked to hear that I had already studied in London and in New York, and that I give much of my time to Theatre Memphis, because, how could anyone as lowly as me accomplish anything without your guidance. But I'm sure I will soon regret possibly the worst "wrong choice" of my life. And to think, I could have signed with a local (Memphis?!) talent agent. Fame and fortune could have been mine for the taking. I was so close.
P.S. My mother wanted me to let you know how much she enjoyed the conversation she had with you after you procured my home phone number without my knowledge and interrogated her as to my whereabouts and activities, even though she didn't know who the hell you were and vice verse.
P.P.S. I do regret cancelling at the last minute, and I apologize. That was rude. I only hope you don't stalk me and kill me in my sleep by bludgeoning me with a copy of the complete works of William Shakespeare, unabridged.
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